Business Writing

Holidaymaking? On Vacation?

Whether you call it a holiday, hols, a vacation, or something else, we are on it. Our office is closed until Tuesday, September 5. I will respond to your comments and email around that time.

Happy trails to you--and us!

Lynn

Beware of 3-Headed Documents

Policies, procedures, processes--these are three distinct types of documents. Unfortunately, their apparent similarities tempt many writers to lump policy, process, and procedure together in one document. When they do, the reader who wants to follow the procedure gets stuck in the policy. The reader who needs to know the policy stumbles through the process description. And the reader who wants to understand the process wanders through the step-by-step procedure.

Here are descriptions of the three P documents:

1. A policy describes the rules:

"We permit telecommuting when it does not interfere with. . . ."
"Customer returns are allowed when the items are in saleable condition and. . . ."
"Make-up lessons are allowed in situations involving illness or family emergency."

A policy does not include steps or a description of who does what.

Sample policies: a teacher's policy on homework, a company's policy on alcohol at company-sponsored events, a union's policy on seniority.

2. A process describes what happens:

"When the Help Ticket is closed, the customer receives a Customer Satisfaction Survey. If the customer completes the survey, a thank you is sent by email. Then a coupon for 10 percent off is generated. . . . "

A process does not include steps to follow, but rather steps to know about. Sometimes flow charts illustrate the steps.

Sample processes: a scientific journal's peer review process, a university's process for determining financial aid, a mortgage company's process for approving loans.

3. A procedure lists the steps to follow to accomplish a task:

1. Slide the black latch in the direction of the arrow.
2. Open the back of the camera.
3. Remove the film.

Procedures frequently begin with a list of parts and equipment needed, often with pictures of them. The steps begin with action verbs (slide, open, remove) that the reader actually follows.

Sample procedures: a recipe, instructions for assembling a desk, steps to follow to update a database.

In a Better Business Writing class last week, two technical writers bemoaned the fact that employees want to publish policies in the company procedure manual. When they are told that what they have written is not a procedure, the employees say, "But it says what we do." Well, not exactly.  It describes the rules.

It is possible to write one document with policy, process, and procedure, as long as the document is broken into distinct sections with clear headings. But when the three parts run together, it becomes a three-headed document--fascinating but impossible to focus on. Usually the reader needs just one part--a procedure to follow, a process to understand, or a policy to adhere to--not all three.

Avoid three-headed documents. Know whether you are writing a process or a procedure or a policy, and stick to a plan. If you do so, your job and your reader's will be a lot easier.

Lynn
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Other search spellings: proceedure, precedure, prosedure, procedger, proccess, polisy, polciy, polices.

Can vs. May--Not So Simple!

The correct places to use the words can and may are not as easily determined as we often imagine. I was reminded of the subtleties in my seminar with the Association of Legal Administrators last week, when an attendee questioned two of my uses. (Thanks, Jennifer! I appreciate your commitment to correctness.)

Here are the simple rules:

Can is for ability:
"Can you drive a car with a standard shift?"

May is for permission or possibility: 
"You may borrow my car next week." (Permission)
"I may arrive late." (Possibility)

But using the simple rules above, the choice between can and may may not be obvious in the sentences below. Which word would you choose?

1. Can/May I have food served in the conference room?
2. Yes, you can/may make arrangements with the onsite cafe.
3. Professional guests can/may have their parking tickets validated.
4. Please leave your phone number so that I can/may call you back.
5. Please approve these specifications so we can/may process your order.
6. You can/may review 440 lessons in the archives.

For the sentences above, does the meaning involve ability, possibility, or permission?

I would say each one involves ability. For example:

1. Am I able to have food served in the conference room?
2. Yes, you are able to make arrangements with the onsite cafe.
3. Professional guests are able to have their parking tickets validated.

I do not see the sentences as communicating permission, but another person might view them that way:

1. Am I permitted to have food served in the conference room?
2. Yes, you are permitted to make arrangements with the onsite cafe.
3. Professional guests are permitted to have their parking tickets validated.

My objection to may is that it may (possibility) be misunderstood. Do the sentences below indicate possibility or permission?

Professional guests may have their parking tickets validated.

Repeat visitors may receive a special discount.

I advise this approach:

If you intend "able to," use can.
If you mean "will possibly," use may.
If you intend "permitted to," use may.

I believe this approach will make the choice clear in nearly all instances, but I may be wrong. That is, I will possibly be wrong, and I am permitted to be wrong--sometimes. I certainly know I can be!

Lynn

Legal Writing Resources

Yesterday I had the opportunity of leading a writing workshop for the Puget Sound chapter of the Association of Legal Administrators. What an intelligent, enthusiastic, precise group!

Participants had several questions specifically pertaining to their profession. Here are two:

1. In a business letter, is it acceptable to CC "All Counsel" or do I need to list each attorney's name? (The group recommended the list.)
2. Is the serial comma (the comma before and in "Mr. Norton, Dr. Wills, and Ms. Raye") required in legal writing? (We decided yes--the comma can make the difference between winning and losing a case.)

Their questions reminded me how important it is to have resources and references in one's own field. Below are three legal writing blogs I recommend. Each one opens the door to many other legal writing resources. 

• The (New) Legal Writer. Tagline: A collection of resources for lawyers, who write.
• Legal Research and Writing. Tagline: Practical insight and commentary on legal research and writing.
• Legalwriting.net. Tagline: Wayne Schiess on making legal writing clear, correct, direct.

Raymond Ward's The (New) Legal Writer led me to Daniel U. Smith's article "Ten Steps to Persuasive Legal Writing." In it, Smith writes:

"If someone says you think like a lawyer, that is often a compliment. But if someone says you write like a lawyer, that's always a criticism."

The excellent efforts of bloggers Raymond Ward, Susan McDonald, and Wayne Schiess should go a long way in changing that perception.

If you are aware of other good resources on business writing in specific fields, please share them.

Lynn

Business Writing for Brilliant People

One night last week I attended a dinner meeting of my local chapter of the American Society for Training and Development (ASTD), my professional organization of people who teach adults. We call ourselves trainers. A trainer at my table was surprised to learn that I teach writing to people who have jobs--and that I teach writing to smart people in savvy organizations. He asked, "Why do they need a writing class? Didn't they take freshman composition?"

This question no longer surprises me since I hear it often. But here is the same question applied to other disciplines:

Why do they need a class in project management? Haven't they been managing projects all their lives?

Why do they need training in presentation skills? Haven't they been making presentations since third grade?

Why indeed?

Why a class in project management? Because managing complex projects in organizations requires special tools, systems, and skills. It takes more than organizing a rummage sale--even one with broken TV sets, lumpy saffron-colored couches, crates of National Geographic, and ashtrays.

Why training in presentation skills? Because a presentation to seal a million dollar deal is not the same as an 8-year-old's presentation on George Washington's winter at Valley Forge--although both may seem just as frightening at the time, especially if the computer crashes or the shoebox diorama collapses.

Why a class in business writing? Because writing proposals and recommendations is not the same as writing descriptive essays on angst in the dormitory or comparisons between the 20th and 21st centuries--although we may all feel just as exposed when we read the changes, comments, or red marks made by our managers or professors.

Highly trained specialists enroll in writing classes so they can write for senior executives. Engineers take writing workshops to learn to communicate with customers. Brilliant people take writing seminars so they can communicate with the rest of us. Practical people sign up for writing courses to get tools, tips, and strategies to write better.

Since I couldn't say all of this while I was eating my plate of pasta at the ASTD dinner, I have said it here. For more about the need for business writing classes, read my post "Why Teach Business Writing?"

Lynn

When Doctors Marry

Lately I have been getting email with questions about addressing married doctors:

What is the proper way to address a letter to a husband and wife who are both doctors?

If a married doctor couple has the same last name, what goes on the envelope?

What if the doctors have different last names?

What if the wife is a doctor and the husband is not?

I checked The Gregg Reference Manual (Gregg) for "official" responses. Shown below are Gregg-approved answers, along with places where I would deviate from the recommended format.

1. If the doctors have the same surname, use this style for the envelope, inside address, and greeting:

Dr. Angel Espinoza
Dr. Marguerite Espinoza

Dear Drs. Espinoza:

Gregg stipulates the style above. However, I believe it would be perfectly acceptable to use this style on the envelope and inside address:

Drs. Angel and Marguerite Espinoza

I personally like both names on one line for a married couple, but if you need a reference manual to support your decision, use the Gregg approach of one name above the other.

2. If the husband and wife have different surnames, Gregg recommends this style:

Dr. Angel Espinoza
Dr. Marguerite Gordon 

Dear Dr. Espinoza and Dr. Gordon:

Once again, because the vertical list has a sense of separation, I would type both names on one line. I also like one professional title rather than two:

Drs. Angel Espinoza and Marguerite Gordon

Dear Drs. Espinoza and Gordon:

3. If the wife is a doctor and the husband is not, do this:

Dr. Pitta Moussa
Mr. James Gomes

Dear Dr. Moussa and Mr. Gomes:

Or do this:

Dr. Nicole Cillo
Mr. Leon Cillo

Dear Dr. and Mr. Cillo:

These posts cover other challenges in letter greetings: Advice on Special Salutations and Salutations in Letters and Email.

I have described the accepted style in the United States. If styles differ in your country, please let me know.

Lynn

Sobering Thoughts on First Impressions

Could you lose out on a new job because of an emoticon? Would a potential romantic interest not be interested in you because of your writing errors? It happens--but I hope it doesn't happen to you.

This week two women told me about rejecting others because of bad first impressions of the other person's writing.

First, a senior human resources (HR) professional told me she did not invite a job candidate back for a second interview because of the person's emailed thank you note: it included an animated emoticon. With that emoticon as evidence, the HR professional decided the candidate did not have the good professional judgment the job required. Note: Before receiving the emailed thank you, she had planned to invite the applicant back.

Second, a friend who is using match.com to meet others told me that she does not respond to a man who makes obvious errors in spelling, punctuation, and grammar. Why not? In her words, "I don't think we would have that much in common."

Although most people (not even me!) do not fall in love based on semicolons and correct verb forms, we do form an impression of others based on how they "look" in writing. My friend determined that a man who did not write correctly would not share her love of ideas and the arts. The HR professional decided that someone who would include an animated smiley face in a thank you letter for a job interview would not make wise decisions on the job.

If you are thinking these two women may have ruled out excellent candidates, I grant that possibility. But from what I know of both women, I believe the candidates lost out on excellent opportunities because of their errors.

What is your view?

Lynn

Learning to Proofread

A reader in North America would like information about how to train as a proofreader. If you can recommend classes or a training program in proofreading, please share information here or email me.

Lynn

Our Common Language?

This week I led a business writing class for two successful nonprofit organizations that focus on energy efficiency. The individuals in the class were intelligent, dedicated, and experienced in their field. These are some of their titles: business systems analyst, technology innovation lead, communications coordinator, program coordinator, project manager, controller, planning analyst, and manager of design and construction.

Like many of us, they use abbreviations and acronyms that are specific to their industry. Here are some of them:

aMW    EE    DR    RTO/ISO    NWS    SCADA    TBL    PBL    CEC    SCE    DLC    PJM    PC    ED    MPER

Do you recognize all the abbreviations above? If not, you have something in common with the class participants. They did not recognize one another's abbreviations--despite the common industry, organizations, goals, and geographical location.

When it comes to abbreviations and acronyms, we do not speak a common language, even when we think we do. (Note: An acronym is an abbreviation that we pronounce as a word rather than letter by letter, like SCADA.) In class after class, I find that people do not recognize one another's abbreviations--even when they work on the same team.

In many cases, no one in a group can state with certainty what the letters of an abbreviation stand for, even when they have a good idea what the abbreviation means.  (Similarly, I used the word snafu for decades without knowing it was an acronym with a salty derivation.)

We won't stop using abbreviations and acronyms. Here is what we can do to be sure our readers understand them:

1. Spell them out the first time we use them, then follow with the abbreviation, like this: Request for Proposals (RFP).

If we used this approach consistently, fewer people would mistakenly use RFP when they are referring to a response to an RFP. (And no one would use snafu!)

Spelling out the first use is the standard approach to defining abbreviations. However, in a long document, spelling out just once will not help readers who flip to a page or screen. For long documents, use suggestions 2 and 3.

2. Electronically link the abbreviation to its definition.

3. Provide a handy glossary. Here handy means very easy to access, perhaps with definitions at the bottom of each page or on each screen.

In some cases, what you see is what you get (WYSIWYG). But when it comes to abbreviations, what your reader thinks may not be what you intend.

Lynn
You may be interested in these two posts on acronyms and abbreviations.

Hone In or Home In?

I was scrolling through the excellent Grammar Hell site today, when I came upon a bit of information that surprised me. It had to do with the use of "hone in" and "home in."

Let's look at the issue. Which is correct in this sentence, "home in" or "hone in"?

I wish we would hone/home in on the real issues.

According to most references including the confident, outspoken Grammar Hell, the correct expression is "home in" because "to home" means "to move or lead toward a goal." The example above can be interpreted like this:

I wish we could move toward the real issues.

In contrast, hone means "to sharpen," as in "to hone one's skills."

Using the explanations above--found in many printed and online resources--"hone in" would never be correct. We do not say "sharpen in."

But grammar and usage are not as unbending as the rules seem to suggest. What if I want to sharpen my focus on something? Couldn't I hone in on it?

Despite the advice of most books on my bookshelf and many online sources, I would say this:

I wish we would hone in on the real issues.

My meaning is "I wish we would focus on [sharpen our focus on] the real issues."

If you care about these topics, you may be wondering whether any reference books support my view. In fact, The American Heritage College Dictionary, Fourth Edition, 2004, open on my desk now, says this:

hone in. 1. To move or advance toward a target or goal. Often used with on. 2. To direct one's attention; focus.

Merriam-Webster Online says this about "hone in":

Etymology: Alteration of "home in": to move toward or focus attention on an objective.

Merriam-Webster also states that although "hone in" is considered a mistake by commentators, it has established itself in American English--and perhaps in British English as well.

Here is the moral of the story: Language is fluid. It changes and stretches. Just when we think we can home in / hone in on a rock-solid rule, we find the sands of language shifting. You take one route, I'll take another, and let's meet gladly at the end of the sentence.

Lynn

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Alternate search spellings: defenition, grammer, langauge, snetence