A friend sent me an example of a marketing message that bombed. Here is how the email started:
Subject: directed me to you
Liz,
I was recently in contact with , who referred me to you. suggested that you would be in charge of evaluating a web conferencing service that helps reduce costs, increase productivity and drive sales.
In three places the writer left out the name of the referring contact--three!
We all make mistakes. But this national sales manager's mistake presented him as someone who lacks attention to detail--a bad quality for a person who sells expensive products and services. Even though the remainder of his message was fine, his beginning killed his chances of getting positive attention. He presented himself as a spammer.
If you use an automated emailing program or service to contact people, always run a test in which you send a message to only yourself. I send a monthly e-newsletter to over 9,500 subscribers. Before it goes out, I test it several times rather than distract thousands of people with any errors.
This month's e-newsletter features marketing techniques to use in your everyday business writing. If you don't yet receive the free newsletter, Better Writing at Work, subscribe here.
Have you received marketing messages that left you amused or miffed? Please share examples.
Lynn
Syntax Training


I think the worst marketing email I received was one that was addressed "Dear Sirs" not only do I object to the general assumption that a company is run by men, but the most cursory research of my company website would have revealed that the MD of this particular company was a woman!
Posted by: Liz Tucker | February 19, 2010 at 04:09 AM
Thanks for mentioning "Dear Sirs," Liz. That greeting can instantly ruin a message.
Lynn
Posted by: Lynn Gaertner-Johnston | February 19, 2010 at 12:42 PM
Great post, Lynn!
I manage a twice-monthly e-mail list at work and an occasional poetry mailing from my personal blog; and I can say from painful experience how easy it is for something to go wrong. The only way to be really sure is to send yourself a copy first, print it out, and proof it carefully before sending.
Fortunately, this sort of care sets a professional mailing apart from an amateurish one, so it's definitely worth the effort.
Posted by: Lester Smith | February 19, 2010 at 02:07 PM
Thanks for your admission, Lester.
I agree with your comment about a professional mailing vs. an amateurish one. I have received several e-newsletters with embarrassing errors from a book-writing coach. The errors always make me question her ability to do her job well.
Thanks for stopping by.
Lynn
Posted by: Lynn Gaertner-Johnston | February 22, 2010 at 04:14 PM
Looks like a mass mailing gone wrong. I've received those messed up mailings on occasion from Internet Marketers. On the other hand you could have gotten a "Dear {firstname}, {referrername} referred me to you."
Posted by: Peter Stewart | March 10, 2010 at 09:55 PM
Hi, Peter. I have gotten those messages too.
Lynn
Posted by: Lynn Gaertner-Johnston | March 11, 2010 at 02:52 PM
The latest example I have received started 'Daer reader'.
Error on the second letter of the newsletter kind of killed the vibe.
Posted by: Michael Soininen | July 13, 2010 at 09:00 AM
Great example, Michael! I wonder why the grammar and spelling checker didn't catch "Daer."
Lynn
Posted by: Lynn Gaertner-Johnston | July 13, 2010 at 01:44 PM