Business Writing

Punctuating Bullet Points

In business writing courses, the most common question about punctuation involves how to punctuate bullet points. It's important, since these days we write as many bullet points as paragraphs.

Let me tell you how I punctuate them, and then I will touch on other ways recommended by prestigious style manuals.

Here is what I recommend:

• Use a period (full stop) after every bullet point that is a sentence (as these bullets do).
• Use a period after every bullet point that completes the introductory stem.
• Use no punctuation after bullets that are not sentences and do not complete the stem.
• Use all sentences or all fragments, not a mixture.

Directly below is an example of bullet points that complete the introductory stem. Below that example is a version that does not need periods.

I like living in Seattle because of its:

• Access to culture, natural beauty, and work opportunities.
• Moderate climate--not too hot or too cold.
• Liberal politics and social attitudes.

Here are the things I like about living in Seattle:

• Access to culture, natural beauty, and work opportunities
• Moderate climate--not too hot or too cold
• Liberal politics and social attitudes

There is an exception to putting periods after bullet points that complete the stem sentence: If they are one word or a short phrase that feels like an inventory or shopping list, do not use end punctuation. Below is an example:

I like living in Seattle because of its:

• Culture
• Natural beauty
• Work opportunities
• Moderate climate
• Liberal politics
• Social openness

I follow The Gregg Reference Manual's rules on punctuating bullets. I like the approach because it is crisp and clear. 

Garner's Modern American Usage, a reference manual I respect and use, also inserts periods at the end of bullet points--if they begin with a capital letter. However, Garner notes:

"If you begin each item with a lowercase letter, put a semicolon at the end of each item, use and after the next-to-last item, and put a period after the last item."

The Chicago Manual of Style has pages of rules and examples of bullet points, but it agrees with the Garner style quoted above, calling the style "vertical lists punctuated as a sentence." Here is my example of that style:

It is my responsibility to [Garner uses a colon here but Chicago does not]

• provide participant prework questions for your roster of attendees;
• review participants' responses and writing samples; and
• customize the workshop to match individuals’ and the group’s needs.

To me, the style above is too fussy for business writing. It doesn't look crisp or energetic.

For more about those efficient chunks of text we use so often, read my post "Best Practices for Bullet Points." 

If you would enjoy commenting on bullet point style, please do.

Lynn
Syntax Training

Don't Be Fooled by Microsoft's Non-Errors

In Microsoft Office the grammar and spelling checker often flags non-errors. It flags certain constructions that have "fooled" the software into detecting a possible error. 

My grammar and spelling checker flagged a potential error in each item below. But don't be fooled! Each item is correct.   

1. I am wondering who they are and how to reach them.
   Microsoft suggests changing who to whom, but the sentence requires the subject pronoun who.
2. Thank you for letting Michael know about the situation.
   Microsoft suggests changing know to knows, which is obviously incorrect.
3. This magazine may give you ideas for decorating the kitchen.
   Microsoft suggests replacing you with your--wrong!
4. Suzan says it is difficult to write about herself.
   Microsoft suggests replacing herself with her, which changes the meaning.
5. Treasurer’s Report (as a heading)
   Microsoft suggests replacing Treasurer's with "Treasurer is."
6. Kate, thank you for your help.
   Microsoft flags this as a fragment, but it is a perfectly fine sentence.
7. Please look over your bid to see if there is anything you can do to lower the price.
   Microsoft suggests a comma after anything--wrong!
8. Thanks, Bob!
   Microsoft suggests deleting the comma, but the comma is required in direct address.
9. She earned a master’s degree in communication from the University of Notre Dame.
   Microsoft wants to capitalize of--wrong!
10. The session will run from 1 to 5 p.m.
    Microsoft wants to change 1 to one--wrong!
11. We need to know our guest's preferred dinnertime.
    Microsoft suggests "guest has" rather than the possessive form guest's.
12. I have taught thousands of professionals at all organizational levels.
    Microsoft suggests professional's and professionals'--both are wrong.

In many of the examples, you can tell why the software was fooled. For instance, "Michael know" would be wrong in most sentences, but not in the construction "Thank you for letting Michael know." The number 1 is often spelled out, but not with a.m. or p.m. Guest's can mean "guest has," but not in Item 11.  

Before you accept a change your grammar and spelling checker suggests, be sure you understand it. In Microsoft Office, click "Explain" when your software offers that option, and see if the explanation makes sense. If you aren't sure whether your sentence is correct, try revising it in a way that makes sense to you.

Does your grammar and spelling checker find other non-errors? Please share them here.

Lynn
Syntax Training

Most Common Writing Error of 2011

Although today is only November 15, I can already tell you the most common error in people's business writing this year. It is the use of this word:

memo's

When people sign up for my writing courses, I ask them, among other things, what kinds of business messages they write. Their responses reveal the error: 

I write email, reports, memo's, and presentations.

I write memo's requesting funds for capital purchases.

The plural of memo is memos--not memo's. We should all write memos.

The word memo's can be a correct possessive form. Examples:

I could not understand the memo's intent.

The memo's format was unconventional.

Grammar purists might frown at the possessive form used with an inanimate object, which my two examples directly above use. They would prefer these constructions:

I could not understand the intent of the memo. [OR] I could not understand the writer's intent.

The format of the memo was unconventional.

Despite the preferences of purists, possessive forms with inanimate objects are fine unless the resulting expression is awkward. For example, "the bottom of the barrel" and "the foot of the bed" are common phrases. "The barrel's bottom" and "the bed's foot" would be awkward replacements.

If you are someone who mistakenly uses memo's, set your software to automatically correct it to memos. If everyone does that, I will be able to report a new most common error in 2012.

What is the most common error you have seen in business messages this year?

Lynn
Syntax Training

Mens and Womens Glasses?

I stopped by a "vision center" today to get my eyeglasses fixed. While waiting, I noticed the signs above the eyeglass frame displays. They said "Mens" and "Womens."

Maybe the apostrophes just wouldn't fit on the signs, which should have said "Men's" and "Women's." Or maybe the signmaker didn't have apostrophes.

Here's an illustration of why the signs needed apostrophes:

Man = singular noun
Woman = singular noun

Men = plural noun
Women = plural noun

Man's  = singular posssessive (that man's glasses)
Woman's = singular possessive (that woman's glasses)

Men's = plural possessive (many men's glasses)
Women's = plural possessive (two women's glasses)

Mens = incorrect word
Womens = incorrect word

If you are having a sign made, make sure your signmaker uses apostrophes for possessive forms. Or try this approach: "Frames for Men" and  "Frames for Women."

You may be wondering whether I mentioned the missing apostrophes to the staff at the vision center. No, I don't want to be rude. If they had asked, of course, I would have shared the rules.

Lynn
Syntax Training 

Looking for a Babysitter. Call Jane.

Katherine, a reader, sent me an excellent example of the confusion that can result from messages that are stingy with words and punctuation. Katherine saw this handwritten advertisement on a bulletin board:

Looking for a good, responsible babysitter. Call Jane.

Underneath the announcement were small slices of paper, each with Jane's phone number, for people to tear off.

Is Jane a responsible babysitter looking for work? Or is she a parent in search of a sitter?

Katherine described the confusion: "The punctuation suggested that she was looking for a babysitter, but the nature of the sheet with tear-off slips and the fact that most advertisements of this sort are for people trying to find work as a babysitter led me to believe that perhaps it was a punctuation error."

These two revised signs clarify the situation:

Looking for a good, responsible babysitter? Call Jane.

If you are a good, responsible babysitter, call Jane.

You might wisely argue that neither version says enough. What about the hours, days of the week, number of children, geographical location, or other details? But in both versions at least we can tell whether Jane is seeking work or seeking a babysitter. 

Do you have an example of business writing that confuses by saying too little? Please share it, as Katherine did. Thanks, Katherine!

Lynn
Syntax Training

50 Ways to Test Your Proofreading Skills

I am excited to announce Error Quests, a new product we just released. It is a collection of 50 short excerpts from business messages, each one containing just one error in grammar, usage, word choice, sentence structure, or punctuation. Your job is to find the single error according to business writing standards in the U.S. and Canada. (American spellings are used.)

Here is a sample Quest. Can you find and correct just one error in it? 

Error Quest 24
We are pleased that you have made your travel plans. Once you arrive at the airport and retrieve your baggage, you will be able to get a taxi just outside the baggage claim area. A typical one way fare from the airport to our conference center is $40. The trip takes approximately 45 minutes in rush-hour traffic.

Error Quests comes as a printed booklet and as a PDF. In the printed booklet, you can find the solution to each Error Quest just beneath it (no peeking!). In the PDF, you can click for the solution, and it will appear on the screen right below the Quest. Try this PDF sampler of five Error Quests.

Well, did you find the error in Error Quest 24?

Here is the solution:

Solution
The error involves the adjective one way before fare. It should be rendered as one-way. The hyphen is required to link the two parts of the compound adjective before the word fare. If the sentence had read “A typical fare is $40 one way,” no hyphen would be required because one way comes after fare rather than before it. Similar examples requiring a hyphen are two-door cars, three-week trip, 10-minute breaks, and 20-year drought.

Of the 50 Quests in the booklet, 44 have appeared in our monthly e-newsletter Better Writing at Work; 6 are new Quests.

Many people have told me how much they enjoy testing their skills each month in the newsletter. Their positive comments gave me the idea to collect the Quests into a handy booklet of quick proofreading tests. Each Error Quest presents an error I have found in clients' writing--nothing rare or ridiculously difficult.

Interested? Error Quests as a booklet or PDF is just US$9.95. Read more.

Enjoy!

Lynn
Syntax Training

How to Render Titles When Italics Aren't Possible

Liz wrote the other day with an interesting question:

"When writing a Facebook wall post, it isn't possible (as far as I know) to italicize or underline anything. So how does one properly punctuate titles of works of art/literature? Quotes can work fine for a single item, but the difficulty arises when citing major and minor works within the same sentence."

This example illustrates Liz's question:

He quoted from the chapter "Don't Keep Score" in Keith Ferrazzi's Never Eat Alone.

If Liz follows the style of putting large works in italics, with their smaller parts in quotation marks, how would she render the book title without the use of italics or underlining?

She would render it in full caps, like this:

He quoted from the chapter "Don't Keep Score" in Keith Ferrazzi's NEVER EAT ALONE.

The Gregg Reference Manual recommends this approach, and I like it.

Thanks for asking, Liz.

Lynn
Syntax Training

Wondering About Question Marks?

Today I received a sales message by email that included this sentence in the opening paragraph:

I am contacting you today to see if you might have an interest in marketing your product in China?

That is a statement. Why does it end with a question mark?

A statement should end with a period (full stop)--not a question mark. These examples are all correct:

• Rochelle asked whether you have considered taking a business writing class.
• I wonder whether Cecilia will be able to meet the visitors from Ottawa.
• The only question she asked was when the registration fee would be due.
• Why he estimated the proposal preparation fees at $12,000 is a mystery. 
• The important question is not when to retire--it's how to afford it.

If you want to use a question mark, write a question:

• Rochelle asked, "Has Jen considered taking a business writing class?"
• I wonder: Will Cecilia will be able to meet the visitors from Ottawa?
• The only question she asked was this: When will the registration fee be due?
• Why did he estimate the proposal preparation fees at $12,000? It is a mystery. 
• The important question is not when to retire. It's, How can we afford it?

In spoken communication, you may choose to raise your pitch at the end of a statement to indicate the questioning aspect of it. For example, if the sales message I quoted above had come by phone, the person might have said it this way, with a higher pitch at the end:

I am contacting you today to see if you might have an interest in marketing your product in China?

As I was checking the rules in The Gregg Reference Manual, I noted Gregg's helpful comment: "When the verb precedes the subject (shall we, can we), the question is direct [and requires a question mark]. When the verb follows the subject (we shall, we can), the question is indirect [and requires a period]."

I am wondering whether you found this blog post helpful. (No question mark.) Did you?

Lynn
Syntax Training

The Latest Word on the Word "Email"

If you have been holding back on using the word email, without a hyphen, in your business writing, waiting for a style manual to firmly support your choice, The Associated Press (AP) has finally acted.

On March 18, AP announced the change in style from e-mail to email. The change will appear in the next edition of The AP Stylebook, but AP is using email already in its news stories. For example, see the story "Email to Wis. gov. initially favored union rights," in which email appears as a noun (email and emails) and as a verb.

I have been using the unhyphenated version for years, and I am delighted that a style manual has finally come out unequivocally in its favor.

If you like to compare the views of experts, here is the latest word from respected resources:

Gregg Reference Manual, 11th Edition (2011), does not offer a firm opinion. It states, "The original form. . . E-mail--is now primarily spelled as e-mail but is increasingly appearing as email." 

Garner's Modern American Usage, 3rd Edition (2009), surveys current usage but appears to prefer e-mail: "The unhyphenated email is unsightly, but it might prevail in the end. In print sources, e-mail is five times as common as email. Ultimately, the hyphen may well disappear."

The Chicago Manual of Style, 16th Edition (2010), unfortunately lists only e-mail, as does Merriam-Webster's Collegiate Dictionary, 11th Edition (2009).   

The American Heritage College Dictionary, 4th Edition (2010), offers three variants, all equally acceptable in its editors' eyes: e-mail, email, and E-mail.

If you have been waiting to change your business writing style to email, this is your moment! Just go through all your documents and globally replace e-mail with email. Then set your software to automatically correct any future uses of the hyphenated version. When your editor or supervisor questions the change, just cite the Associated Press.

Are you emailing yet?

Lynn
Syntax Training

Error in an Ezine to 11,192 People

Last week I published my monthly e-newsletter Better Writing at Work and sent it to more than 11,000 subscribers. One of them, proofreader and copyeditor Geoff Pope, found an error in the title of the newsletter and lead article. Can you find it?

"Hot Button Language to Avoid—and Words You Must Include"

I

will

stretch

out

a

space

here

so

you

can

find

the

error

without

seeing

my

correction

below.

Title: "Hot Button Language to Avoid—and Words You Must Include"

Did you find the error?

Do you like your button language hot?

The title needs a hyphen between the words hot and button!

Here is an explanation: I was not writing about "hot language" or "button language." I meant hot-button language. I needed the hyphen to connect the two parts of the compound word.

I know the rule, of course. I just overlooked the phrase.

Sometimes when people write to me, they admit they are nervous about communicating with a business writing expert. They don't want to make an error with me as their reader.

I tell them to relax and imagine how I feel when I make an error in a message to more than 11,000 readers--and in the title, no less.

Geoff, thanks for the correction, which you delivered with humor and style. I won't make that mistake again!

Lynn
Syntax Training