Although all Americans and many people throughout the world have been touched by various disasters, some have been touched more deeply. These are people who have lost or been separated from loved ones, whose homes or businesses have been destroyed, or whose future has been turned upside down in one way or another.
For those who have experienced a profound loss, it is very helpful to hear from others. Receiving notes and calls helps to reduce isolation, loneliness, and helplessness. Yet for those outside the experience it can often be hard to know what to say to someone whose life has been changed by suffering and loss. Here are some suggestions and examples to reduce the difficulty and awkwardness.
Suggestions: Send an email or a note through regular mail. Don’t be embarrassed if you can’t think of the “right” words. Just write what you feel. Acknowledge the other person’s loss. Express your care, concern, or understanding. Close with an expression of sympathy.
Words cannot express how sorry we are about the recent tragic events that have touched you so deeply. Your loss is huge, and we can only imagine the hurt you feel.
We want you to know that you are in our thoughts and prayers. Please accept our condolences and our hopes for your healing and renewal.
I am so sorry about the heartbreaking losses you have experienced through the Hurricane. Please accept my deepest sympathy.
As you move through the difficult days and weeks ahead, you will be present in my thoughts. If there is anything I can do to ease your loss, please let me know. I would be grateful for the opportunity to help you.
With sincere sympathy,
We are deeply sorry to learn about your losses caused by the hurricane and its terrible aftermath. Please know that we are all thinking about you and your coworkers as you piece together your lives and your work.
You have our sincere condolences.
Talking with ______, I learned about how the Hurricane has upset your plans for school [retirement, business]. I am very sorry this has happened. I know it must be extremely difficult for you and others in your situation.
I simply want you to know I am thinking of you. I wish you the best possible outcome as you navigate this very difficult time.
I hope these examples are helpful in writing notes of sympathy and condolence. Please see our article on a more general guide on how to write a note of condolence when you aren’t able to change anything about the situation, as well as some notes on writing the most difficult of condolences.